I don't know why, but I know I can't stay

I was attacked by a flying saucer yesterday afternoon. I have the bumps on my head to prove it. At first the people in the ER didn't believe me and looked at me funny, but then I explained and they got it.
I think the shot to the head jarred something loose, I've been a little out of it since then. And all this anxiety over the job situation is becoming clearer, I think. Its not the search thats so much scary, as it is the thought of actually getting a job, and being commited to it. Not so much scary, as a daunting task I guess. But one I'm gradually becoming more comfortable taking on.
Ever felt alone in a crowded room? Of course you have, everyone has at some point or another, dumb question, nevermind.
Random ambiguous blog comment that no one really understands.
Explanation of previous comment explaining that no one will really understand it.
I like Neon Bible. and Oh, Inverted World. And the neat songs on Juno. And Hopes and Fears. And the Blue Album.
I calculated what my tax return should be from last year. It makes me smile.
I've noticed that I have a few different styles of handwritting. One even I can't read. Another looks really cool, I think.
When I started this blog I'm pretty sure I had one particular subject I was gonna drone on about, but I forgot it and wrote a few one liners instead. It was fun.
______ of the day: What a long and strange journey its been.
The swell-headed Ogukuo

Iowa weather is ADD

Thanks to all those who contributed job ideas, right now burning monkeys is near the top of the list.

For the past few weeks we haven’t gotten above 15 degrees. A lot of days weren’t above 5. Tomorrow and Monday are both supposed to be in the low 40s. And then Tuesday is supposed to be a high of 9. Yikes.

Resume work seems to be on the downward slope, its starting to look somewhat real and near completion. I guess that means its time to start the harder, more abstract portion of the job hunt. Working on the resume is relatively easy, I can see what I’m doing, and what needs to be done. Now I need to focus more on contacting places and getting my name out there. That’s a bit more of an abstract process. Should prove to be interesting. So far I’ve narrowed it down to four types of jobs I want to look into (besides those suggested by you, the reading public): architectural design work, banking, working at a winery, and a job working with kids in some facet. Kinda a varied selection, all seem interesting and challenging. Now it’s a matter of looking at these jobs and whether any of them is a possibility.

I am trying to keep up with the healthy eating thing, but its been difficult the last week or so. Mostly for reasons of time, and lack of variety of food. I’ve found some really simple, really awesome meals to make, but I’ve only found a few of them, and repetition is making things boring. It would probably be simpler if I were making food for more than one, but single serving recipes usually don’t fall into the healthy category. Surprisingly, the list of foods I consider good is growing to include spinach, garbanzo beans, fish, and asparagus. These are 4 things I would have considered untouchable in the past. Now I enjoy them, especially asparagus. And I just received a box of real oranges from California, so that has been a super neat treat.

______ of the day: My life needs a little salt and pepper. And some sleep.

The posting Ogukuo

Be My Escape

I’ve given up on giving up slowly, I’m blending in so

You won’t even know me apart from this whole world that shares my fate

This one last bullet you mention is my one last shot at redemption

because I know to live you must give your life away

And I’ve been housing all this doubt and insecurity and

I’ve been locked inside that house all the while You hold the key

And I’ve been dying to get out and that might be the death of me

And even though, there’s no way in knowing where to go, promise I’m going because

I gotta get outta here

I’m stuck inside this rut that I fell into by mistake

I gotta get outta here

And I’m begging You, I’m begging You, I’m begging You to be my escape.

I’m giving up on doing this alone now

Cause I’ve failed and I’m ready to be shown how

He’s told me the way and I’m trying to get there

And this life sentence that I’m serving

I admit that I’m every bit deserving

But the beauty of grace is that it makes life not fair

Cause I’ve been housing all this doubt and insecurity and

I’ve been locked inside that house all the while You hold the key

And I’ve been dying to get out and that might be the death of me

And even though, there’s no way in knowing where to go, promise

I’m going becauseI gotta get outta here

Cause I’m afraid that this complacency is something

I can’t shakeI gotta get outta here

And I’m begging You, I’m begging You, I’m begging You to be my escape.

I am a hostage to my own humanity

Self detained and forced to live in this mess I’ve made

And all I’m asking is for You to do what You can with me

But I can’t ask You to give what You already gave

Cause I’ve been housing all this doubt and insecurity and

I’ve been locked inside that house all the while you hold the key

And I’ve been dying to get out and that might be the death of me

And even though, there’s no way in knowing where to go, promise I’m going because

I’ve gotta get outta here

I’m stuck inside this rut that I fell into by mistake

I’ve gotta get outta here

And I’m begging You, I’m begging You, I’m begging You to be my escape.

I fought You for so long

I should have let You in

Oh how we regret those things we do

And all I was trying to do was save my own skin

But so were You

So were You

I'm just an ordinary guy, and all I want is to be loved

I have no idea what I want to do with my life. Any suggestions?

The lost Ogukuo

You, fly over there

I spent a sizable amount of time today looking at websites offering advice on resume building, interviews, career shifts, etc. Although I feel a bit more well versed in the various facets of this whole process, I don't feel any less scared of it. I also confused myself quite a bit by looking at some lists of interesting jobs that one wouldn't normally consider for employment. There weren't any in particular that jumped out at me (except one, I'll get to that in a minute), but it made me realize that theres alot more job choices out there that I realized. It makes me question my plan of seeking an office desk job. Yes, I would enjoy design work, but sitting at a desk all day every day would kinda drive me batty I think. The one job on the list of abnormal jobs that really stuck out at me was air traffic controller. The first thing I thought when I saw this was "who says 'I wanna be an air traffic controller when I grow up!'?". I mean, really, people want to be pilots, teenagers get stuck lugging bags around and working at airport crap stores, and I would assume that business majors work behind the airline counters and get yelled at all day. But air traffic controller? That one seems to be kinda out of left field. I fell off my chair when I saw the wages tho, median compensation is $117, 240 a year. Thats median!! It listed wages as high at $145,000 a year! I thought that was ridiculous, but it is a federal job, so that kinda makes sense. At this point I was quite intrigued and read a little more into the job, and I guess its pretty hard to get into the field. Training here, more training there, multiple years of on the job training, and a list of positions to move thru thats extremely long. Don't get the idea I've completely changed my career goal over the last 12 hours, but the job definitely piqued my interest.
And now I'm done.
_______ of the day: Just what does 'fair compensation' mean?
The still-searching Ogukuo

I complain, you get bored

I've fallen into the January blahs. For the past few months I've gotten used to living from one exciting event to another, and now thats all over and I'm left with just work. The next big thing I get to look forward to is going to Washington at the end of February. I don't even get a full day off from work for another week.
I'm also sorta entering job search mode. As most people know, this is horrorfying. I hate job searches, its a whole lot of building myself up, dressing up, doing interviews, getting turned down, perhaps finding something I want, and then it gets hard. Then I gotta learn how to do a new job, figure out if I'm good at it, and figure out if I like it. I also gotta completely switch from one sorta work to another. Chances are the next job I get will be an office job, which means I'll be sitting in front of a computer most of the day. Hopefully I'll like the work I'll be doing, but either way, that kinda setting can get boring. And all of that job stuff adds to the January blahs, cause I know its gonna be a whole lotta work. And I know I may go thru all of this work of finding a job and end up in one I'm not particularly good at or like.
So that is that, and now I'm very hungry and I think I'm gonna make a nice frosted mini wheats, banana, and granola mixture. If you haven't tried doing this, you should, its awesome.
_______ of the day: some toast would be nice too.
The hungry Ogukuo

Door knobs and taxes

Wow, its 2008. Thats something that didn't strike me until sometime late on December 31, 2007. Yes, I knew it was New Years, and was planning on a "party", but the fact that it was going to be 2008 just somehow didn't hit home. But, I have now written out a few checks and am secure in the fact that it is indeed 2008. I'm sure I will be even more aware of this as tax forms start rolling in for the close of 2007. I have decided I don't like taxes. Not so much the fact that I have to pay them, thats inevitable. But the fact that I need to fill out much paper work and prove this, that, and the next thing. I have a tough enough time remembering when payday is much less where it all goes.
In happier news, our house now has a fully functioning door knob on the front door!! This may seem like a simple luxary, mostly cause it is. Its now a simple luxary we can claim :). Also jerry-rigged a new light switch in our kitchen. Evidentally we have the only house ever built with this very messed up style of wiring, so getting any switches is impossible. Thru a bit of trial and error, leading to much amusement and frustration, we now have a low voltage momentary contact switch that closely resembles a missle launch button. But, amazingly, it does the job and does not interfer with the rest of the lights in the house.
I have decided that watching HGTV makes me operate in a mindset that is entirely outside my price range. This is highly disappointing. I yearn for the day when I have a house of my own to work on. Of course, I say this now, once I have one I'll probably hate being tied to it.
I've run out of blog topics I want to write about, so I'll stop.
______ of the day: Muse has a song called Fillip, that is funny.
The unworded Ogukuo