30 April 2007

If life were easier...It wouldn't be as entertaining

So, some choices were made for me, and that leaves me with fewer decisions to make on my own. But now I realize that the choices I have left are logistically almost impossible. I can't really say what they are, but basically the choice I'm faced with is making a long term commitment to something, locking myself into a situation that is very difficult to be in. And by difficult, I mean financially so. I'm really stuck, I mean, its a decision that I know I would enjoy, but it would mean scraping by for quite a while. And I simply don't know if I can do that. Don't think me greedy, I'm talking about lifes "simple" expenses such as student loans, rent, utilities, a car payment (not right now, but sooner or later I'm gonna need a real car), insurance, gas, food, and in theory it would be nice to have a little something to put away in savings. Of course, I mean strickly theoretical, cause thats all it is right now.
So this is me stressing a little (read as alot), although you probably really can't tell it just by looking at me, I tend to hide it well. After all, why should I let a stupid thing like money dictate weather I'm fun to be around or not?
So, please pray for me, cause I really honestly have no idea what decision I'm gonna make. And basically its probably going to come down to what decision I can make more than what decision I want to make.
______ of the day: I need to grab life by the curve balls it keeps throwing me
The undecision'd Ogukuo

25 April 2007

Decisions+choices= the same thing!

Wow, this is unfamiliar territory...been a while.
So, yeah, I'm on days now at Niessink. Its been an interesting few weeks, but I like it. The hardest part is the hours, in at work at 6:30 am, and out at 10:30 pm. Long break inbetween those shifts, but I still haven't had a solid 8 hours of sleep in several weeks.
So, you know what sucks? Decisions. And I don't mean weather to wear black or white socks, I mean real decisions. Seems like I'm bad at making them. Even the no brainers have presented quite the challenge. And, its looking like I may have to be making an even bigger decision here in the next few days. A decision that would basically affect where I go every day. I'm not exactly sure of my options yet, but I'll hopefully know soon. And when I do know, the hard decision follows. And I really don't know which direction to go with this one. It never ceases to amaze me how complicated life can be.
So, in other news, um, well, I haven't had time to create any news, cause all I've had time for recently is work and sleep. Perhaps thats good, keeps me out of trouble. Oh, I got one! Band stuff! We totally released the new CD! And its taking quite well it seems. We had a show this past weekend which has been rated as one of our best by several people, and we have another on this Friday night, you all (2.7 of you who read this) should come! Cause then you could totally get the CD if you don't have it already. Or enjoy the songs live if you do have it.
Ok, random transmission ended, I now need to get ready for work.
______ of the day: I look at all the lovely people
The decision'd Ogukuo

01 April 2007

End of an era

Gentle Readers,
This will be my last blog from the overnight shift. This is my last scheduled night, I start days on Wednesday. I’m looking forward to it, but I also am kinda scared. I found out I’m the primary care-taker of one of the boys, so that means I’m in charge of taking him shopping, coming up with his skill plans and his general care. So in other words, when he’s being a problem, I’m the one they call to deal with it. Yay. And scary. I’m not quite sure how to handle all of that. I hope they break me into this slowly. I’m guessin the first few weeks are gonna be the hardest with learning the rules and how each boy needs to be handled. But, I don’t gotta choice, its gonna happen, so I may as well make the most of it and learn as quickly as possible. Once I get used to it, it will be a lot nicer when I have days off and I can actually do stuff instead of being awake all night doing nothing cause everyone else is asleep. But being in at work at 6:30 am is somewhat less than appealing, I must say. That may end up being quite the challenge. Hopefully I’ll be able to sleep in the late morning when I’m not at work and everyone else is either in class or working.
______ of the day: Hold your nose because here comes the cold water.
The diving in Ogukuo